These cupcakes are my fight against the overwhelmingly rich, cloyingly sweet cupcakes that seem to be the norm.  Mellow, creamy, and refreshing describes these, just like a cup of Earl Grey tea – Cambridge style.  Just sweet enough that you can finish one, and secretly want another.  Substituting Earl Grey with green tea, black tea, Oolong, or Maté, to name a few, allows for many delicious possibilities.

Cupcakes:

• 2 Cups All-Purpose Flour
• 2 teaspoons baking powder
• Pinch salt
• 1 1/2 sticks unsalted butter @ room temperature
• 1 1/2 cups sugar
• 3 eggs
• 1 cup milk (whole, vitamin D is what I used) (1/2 c. to be used for cakes, 1/2 c. to be used for frosting)
• 3/4 cup sour cream
• 1/8 teaspoon real vanilla extract
• 3 bags of tea, Earl Grey or most other bagged teas (DO NOT use “citrus” teas such as a Zinger, or Passion Tea- they will curdle the milk!)

1. Preheat oven to 350 F.
2. Combine flour, baking powder and salt in separate large bowl – set aside.
3. Combine butter and sugar in mixer until light, smooth and fluffy…
4.  At this point, warm milk in saucepan on stove-top on very low heat and steep 3 tea bags in warmed milk being sure to turn heat off when warmed.  Measure out 1/2 cup infused milk – set aside.  Cover and save remainder for frosting.
5. …Add one egg at a time to mixer, beating in well with butter and sugar mixture.
6. Slowly add vanilla, 1/2 cup infused milk, and sour cream – mix well.
7. On medium speed, gradually mix in dry ingredients (the flour mixture set aside).
8. Fill lined cups 2/3 full with batter.
9. Bake for about 18-20 minutes, rotating pan @ 10 minutes.  Check at 18 minutes for springy centers and if a toothpick comes out clean (means they’re done).
10. Let cool completely on cooling rack.

Peach-Earl Grey Whipped Cream Frosting:

• 1/2 cup remaining tea-infused milk
• 6-10 frozen peach slices
• 1 – 8oz. bucket Cool Whip (or 4 cups heavy cream)

1. Add infused milk and frozen peaches to blender.
2. Pulse/blend to chop peaches.
3. Add Cool Whip or heavy cream to blender.
4. Pulse/blend until smooth with no peach chunks.
5. Pour mix into large bowl and whisk vigorously and continuously until thoroughly whipped, forming stiff peaks.  Frosting should be thick and able to stand on its own!
6. Refrigerate frosting while cupcakes are cooling completely.

*Option:  Sprinkle Lavender Vanilla Sugar or bits of dried lavender on top of frosted cupcakes.*

***This whipped cream frosting will melt if left out.  Best to refridge it and wait to frost cupcakes until they are about to be eaten, unless you want to refridge all finished frosted cupcakes.***

As I got caught up in the search for early color films (pre-1939 era) I chanced upon this video.  I was somehow moved by it.  When I scrolled through the comments I saw that I wasn’t alone…and that I did not expect.

There is something so transient, so beautifully, mortally human about these film tests.  The images of the models (some were actresses and performers; Hope Hampton, Mary Eaton and Mae Murray) are arresting and inviting simultaneously.  The color and clarity of the film, though not totally “true to life”, manage to be enough to provoke an air of reality.  Powerful reality that transcends the “stuck-in-the-film” perception we all seem to have of images filmed long ago.  These models do not look stuck in the film at all.  They look like real women that had feelings and that breathed, not like grainy black and white paper dolls.  It’s almost as if your best friend or sister dressed up in circa 1922 styling and stood in front of you, posing and smiling.

One particular reason this film touched me so much is that my grandmother, Rita, was born the same year this was shot.  She is 89-years-old and remembers the Great Depression.  My grandmother could have appeared in this very film as an infant.  She is still alive today.  This reminds me that for people in 1922 time passed just the same then as it does for us now.  Life went on exactly the same way before we were born…and sometimes it is easy to imagine that everything must have been so different.  But it really wasn’t.

Related articles

• Kodachrom Film Test 1922 (retrorambling.wordpress.com)
• What is Kodak Kodachrome (wiki.answers.com)
• Kodak – 1922 Kodachrome Film Test (retrorambling.wordpress.com)

So, I’m gonna do everything in my power to extol the wonders and beauty of this color combination.  Crimson and aqua, in all their forms, makes for some arresting visuals.  It’s a perfect combination of ethereal and serene, and passionate and intense.  This combo has real balance.  It’s my absolute favorite, so my bedroom will be done in those colors.  Here are some palettes and pictures:

Come on now.  Go do it…now.  Especially paired with black, white and/or ivory these colors are amazing…they make a definite impact, but not in a showy, gaudy way.  Stop covering everything with sage green and taupe and start using color in ways that make you feel inspired.  Now, there’s nothing wrong with sage green and taupe, but let’s be honest…middle aged homemakers all over the country (at least) think the best they can do is neutral, neutral, neutral, safe, safe, safe.  Well, that’s not the best anyone can do!  And no color is truly dangerous or threatening in the correct measure.  It’s how you interpret color, how you become affected by color, and how you choose to express emotion and “vibe” with color that makes every color acceptable.  Color is not a thing to be afraid of, for it is a tool of expression.  Expression is one of the most beautiful and freeing things in life, so start expressing yourself!  And paint a few walls while you’re at it.

Here is a link to My Colourlovers Profile.  I create color palettes and use them in patterns on this amazing website.  Check it out, and see if you might want to join, too…I know I love it.

There are things that have recently happened that have been a long time coming.  Not the least of which is my desire to write another blog post.

For anyone living in the Chicago area or within at least 100 miles of it, they will tell you that this has been one of the longest winters…spring has been stuck in March weather perpetually.  And I’ll tell you what; two days ago it was in the 50′s.  Today it’s supposed to get up in the 90′s.  What’s that all about?  At 9:30 am, this morning, it was already in the 80′s.  Good god.  I just want it to stick.  I’m ready for summer.

Besides the ridiculous weather, another interesting tidbit is that I moved out!  Finally.  Eric and I got a two bedroom apartment on the border of Crown Point and Schererville, IN.  Our second-floor balcony has to be about 12-15 feet long…it’s huge.  We bought a cheap little bistro set to put out there and I got myself some hanging fuschias to start.  I took pictures:

My bedroom isn’t quite finished yet, but I’m getting there.  I want to paint the wall on the left side of the picture the same dusty aqua that is on the wall across from it (out of the picture).  Then I will be getting crimson red, sheer drapes.  I’m also thinking about getting a full, ivory canopy for the bed.  Yay!  If anyone wants to come and help me finish the apartment, be my guest…give me a call.

All in all, it’s been great living in my own apartment.  Some pretty stressful moments have come up recently, but for the most part I’m just glad to be where I am now.

Long have I desired a long weekend locked inside with my gentleman lover…what I didn’t expect was that 23.9 inches of snow would be the catalyst!  Yea, just as I thought that we were getting closer to spring by the passing of January into February the two feet of fluffy ice buried us in a winter seeming longer than it does in December.  My perspective of winter has just lengthened considerably.  We shall never escape it, at least that’s how it seems now.  Let us take a look at some very recent images of my town, and my street.

  I went out into the whiteout for 5 minutes to take pictures, and then I realized that my extremities were somehow numb and radiating pain simultaneously.  Needless to say, I went inside after this photo was taken.

  Good times.

  That’s my dad…coming back to dig out his van, located beyond the picture’s borders.

  It took Eric and I 30 minutes or more to get his truck out of the snow…he dug, I drove, we prevailed.  The moment I rolled out of the snow, I felt like I had just won the freaking lottery.  Apparently, he felt the same!

  February 03, 2011, we went around the area to take pictures.  Downtown Highland.

  All of the snow on this street, Highway Avenue, drifted to one side, burying the storefronts.

  The only way to access the shops downtown. 

  That shovel doesn’t really look like it’s gonna do much, does it?  I never realized how many people around here own snowblowers until this storm hit.  Everyone was snowblowing!  There were plumes of snow coming from every sidewalk, driveway and storefront on February 02 and 03, 2011.

  I was no longer tall here.  Six foot+ snow drifts in Highland…and I saw bigger ones.

  The magic corridor of Highland….I mean Antarctica version 2.0.

So, one may wonder, what was I doing during the storm?  I must say it was a great few days.  Eric and I were sent home with some food to hold us over for a night by his mom, Donna, and we hunkered down over a jigsaw puzzle of the sunny Meditarranean for six hours on the first night of the storm.  We made coffee since we couldn’t go out to get any…marvelous.  We stayed up late watching the storm, and watching Netflix. 

The next morning, we woke up and ate the remainder of the food supply.  We finished the puzzle and played Wii Sports Resort until the sun finally came out and the storm had passed after 24 hours.  We worked up the motivation to dig out his truck in 15 degree temperatures and after our victory, we went out to the grocery store to get some more food and soda.  The people at the store were scathingly rude. 

In the evening, after Eric stopped at his parents’ house to shower and get a change of clothes for the next day, we played more Wii Sports (which was SO fun) and we watched La Vie en rose.  I loved it, he sort of liked it, which threw me for a loop.  Oh well.  What a badass Edith Piaf was…vive Edith.

The next morning we made hot dogs, burritos and pizza rolls for breakfast (that’s how we roll!) and fresh coffee.  We had another Wii Sports tournament (which was even more fun) and then we went out into Highland and Munster to take photographs.  We then went to Munster Public Library and picked up the Social Network and the 3 volumes of More Treasures From American Film Archives 1894-1931.  We watched the Social Network which suprised me with how good it was. 

All in all, it was one of the best “weekends” (Eric is off Wednesdays and Thursdays) I’ve had in ages.  So I guess the storm was not all bad, after all.

A little something about me: there is always a nagging, or more pleasantly, a persistant desirous intent in everything I think, do or say.  I always want some kind of epiphany, some kind of revelation.  I want to be wanted, and I want everyone else to know that I want them.  What a great feeling.  Why wouldn’t I want that?  I’m sure it’s something that is unhealthy, somehow, and that I’m going to have to work on it.  Still, in the middle of the dull, gray winter with its dirty heaps of frozen slush and snow along the roadsides and the exhausting colorless cold, I feel like I need to desire something.  It might be one of the only things that gets me through the season every year.

What could be better than sprucing up the interior with some new colors, lighting a few scented candles and incenses, and having a roll in the hay with your lover in the dead of winter?  It makes it bearable…even exciting at times, knowing how bland it is outside of your window and that you are fending it off, rather peacefully.  I’m not trying to deny the winter.  I’m merely attempting to create a sphere of personal space where I can accept it.  If that personal space includes a more desirous mindset, so be it.  It works for me.  Tell me that a part of you doesn’t have a hankering to gaze upon a palm tree on a freezing winter night devoid of any comfort or beauty.  No blizzard to watch, no sparkling snow, no twinkling stars in the vicinity of Chicago.  I’ll take the palm tree, and a bit of rum.  A warm body is a good thing, too.  Let’s all sleep in a big puppy pile and love each other already.

Soldier on, all winter-abiding people.

About 2 months ago I ordered a DNA test kit from National Geographic’s Genographic Project.  I swabbed my cheeks, and sent my DNA in for analysis on my deep maternal ancestry.  Since they only tested my mitochondrial (maternal) DNA, the line traced was strictly maternal, all the way back to 150,000 years ago in Africa.  So, from “mitochondrial Eve” through all the subsequent daughters to me, my ancient ancestry yielded some suprising results.

I am a member of  mtDNA Haplogroup V.  Here’s the ancient migratory route, and where (at the last genetic mutation occuring in my ancestors’ DNA) the last stop ended up:

Southwestern Europe folks.  And here’s another map coloring in the areas where Haplogroup V persons live:

And here is my genetic sequence, and where my mutation occured that signifies what haplogroup I belong to:

A bit of scientific stuff aside…I found out that people in France, Germany, and northern Italy, as well as some of the population of the Basques of Spain, and the Skolt Saami in Scandanavia have the same haplogroup.  There are also populations in northern Africa such as Tunisia, Algeria and Morocco who share this haplogroup with me.  CRAZY!!!  I looked for some pictures of women from these regions and I was startled at how much they all resembled the women in my family.  Very similar coloring!  The northern African women especially suprised me…some of them have fairer skin, light eyes and brown hair like my family does.  Unbelievable.  So, that’s really where I come from, deep down in my ancient history. 

So, if one really wants to answer the question “what is your ethnic background”, I suggest just telling them your Haplogroup, and where that haplogroup is found.  That’s the real root of where you come from, as far as I can see.  For example, if your ancestors from 8 generations ago moved to Denmark and thus made your family into Danes, their haplogroup is still the same as your ancestors from 10,000 years ago.  When and where that genetic mutation occured, I think is what constitutes your origins.  So, my female side of the family is Dutch, but they weren’t always.  Our ancestors moved to Holland at some point after the mutation already occured.  Where my ancestors were around the time of the last mutation is what counts here. 

I’m so excited about this!  I just had to share it with everyone.  And for my friend who we lovingly call, Scoreman, if you look at the migratory path leading out of Africa and into Europe, you’ll see that my deep ancestors DID pass through Lithuania.  So, Scoreman, if you think I look Lithuanian, maybe I take after one of my deep ancestors who lived there thousands of years ago.  Question answered!

Share thoughts, please!

About 4 days ago I watched a documentary on Netflix called The Buddha.  It was one of the most highly recommended titles for me to watch instantly, and I must say…after watching it I was so completely enthralled and curious about Buddhism.  I learned that there are many misconceptions about Buddhism, some of which I had.  These misconceptions were dispelled, and I went out to Borders and bought Buddhism for Dummies.  Great idea.

Some widely believed misconceptions of Buddhism:

• Buddhism is a worship based religion of a deity/deities and one must swear allegiance to deity(s).  NOT TRUE.  Buddhas (once living beings, male and female, who have achieved enlightenment in life) are not really gods.  They serve as examples and teachers of how to attain balance and enlightenment.  They are examples of the Dharma (teachings).
• Buddhism has rules that must be obeyed.  Not exactly…there are precepts which act as guidelines for a peaceful, compassionate and wise way of life.
• There is only one way to practice Buddhism.  Not true at all.  There are many schools of Buddhism that have different focuses, but carry the same message of balance and enlightenment.  There’s a way for everyone.
• Nirvana is the Buddhist “Heaven”.  Nope.  Nirvana is the state achieved upon finding enlightenment in waking life.  It can last for a moment, or for longer!  A synonym could be bliss.
• If you do wrong, you are punished on earth or in Hell.  NOOO.  There is no Hell…there is the concept of reincarnation over and over and over again, until you stop screwing up and you get it right.  Karma takes care of the actions of sentient beings, like us.  If you screw up, Karma might mean being born over and over again.
• Buddhist precepts force people to give up things like pleasure and desire, and turn oneself into an unwavering stone.  NOPE!  Buddhism does not force anyone to do anything.  You come to Buddhism of your own volition, it does not force itself upon anyone or anything.  The goal is not to eliminate all feeling, but to understand it and balance it.  If desire was forbidden, where would the desire be to become enlightened?  Even monks and nuns feel desire, laugh and have great senses of humor!
• You are wrong, and sinful if you do not follow Buddhism.  VERY INCORRECT.  Sin is not really in the Buddhist lexicon…rather Buddhism teaches that actions like killing and lying are unconstructive and harmful for oneself and others, and is not conducive to peace, balance, wisdom, compassion and enlightenment.  If one doesn’t follow Buddhism, that is okay and is one’s choice.  Like I said before, Buddhism is more of a philosophy.

For the past 3 days, I’ve been reading the Dummies book from the beginning.  Teaching myself about Buddhist teachings and practices is such a joy!  So, I learned that Buddhism isn’t so much a religion as it is a philosophy, or a guide to help one live life in peace.  There are no indoctrinating rules, and there is really no dogma to blindly follow.  In most forms of Buddhism, there aren’t even deities that one must worship.  Worship really isn’t a cornerstone of the philosophy at all…respect and reverence for enlightened beings (known as “Buddhas”) is practiced instead of direct worship.  The Buddhas aren’t really gods, they were once living humans who attained enlightenment through meditation, for one thing.  Thinking about the enlightened ones is an inspiration to meditate upon, and the Buddhas lives are merely an example of how to become enlightened.  Worshiping them is not the point.  The idea is that all sentient (conscious) beings have Buddha nature, or have the potential to become Buddhas.  Learning to eliminate suffering and dissatisfaction and reveal compassion and wisdom is the goal.  That enlightenment is a sign of Buddhahood.  It’s really quite simple, and very beautiful.  Don’t be an asshole, don’t be selfish, seek truth, become compassionate toward yourself and others, be a good person.  That’s the point. 

Before I get into meditating, I want to find a teacher.  In the Buddhist tradition, having a teacher or mentor to help you is customary, and recommended.  These teachers, or lamas in some cases, are the ones who really know what they’re doing and understand the nature of the teachings and the practices.  Therefore, having them help you is crucial to not screwing it up.  They also help you find the particular teachings and practices that would benefit you personally, so as to better help you achieve enlightenment and peace.  There isn’t just one way to do the Buddhist thing…there are many different ways!  One way might not be right for one person, but another fits.  I’m doing a lot of research on this now.

So, there it is.  I know a lot of you don’t or won’t agree with me, but that’s okay.  I’m studying this interesting philosophy, and hoping to achieve some inner peace and balance by practicing meditation.  No harm in that, my friends.  Plus, being more compassionate and having loving-kindness never hurt anyone either.  Something to aspire to.  Wish me luck!

The Author and her Gentleman Lover:

It sounds despicable, buying a new life, but sometimes it’s a reality that one must face.  Starting out, I didn’t have much at all.  My computer was so old and didn’t have enough space (2 hard drives, one with 18G and the other with 28G), no car, inability to eat when I needed to, old clothes I didn’t even like anymore (actually everything I had was old and I didn’t like any of it).  Mind you, my teeth are still fucked up…but I have a dentist appointment and I’m ready to get them fixed.  My bed and computer are still used from the floor, but I am planning on buying a REAL bed (frame, box spring, and mattress) and a computer desk.  I still do not have a car, but I’m truly hoping that my financial aid holds out for me long enough that I can get one in a few months.  Things are shaping up for the absolute first time in my entire life, and that’s no lie.  I even have a dressform now, so that I can start making clothes out of my designs.  I bought a Wii, so that I could play new games and watch Netflix in the living room (and so when Eric and I move out, we’ll have that in our home).  I got a bunch of new, classy clothes that suit me as I am now.  I am getting a new CD player installed in Eric’s truck today so that we don’t have to deal with a broken stock player anymore and we can plug my iPod in and listen to that in better sound quality.  Music is very important to us.  That’s just a few things I’ve done so far.  I’m getting happier…although I do feel a little guilty in admitting that my happiness stems from being able to buy my life anew.  Terrible.  But then again, I’ve never had any money.  I mean close to none at all.  This really is the first time I can buy myself the things I need, and want.  My environment is slowly starting to look like me.  That’s a big deal for me.  For that reason I shouldn’t feel guilty.  Besides, I’ve been taking care of Eric and my friends all the while.  I love it.  I fucking love it.  My poor friend, Rachel, is now in the position I was in before.  She’s broke, has tons of bills to pay, lives with her dad, and desires nothing more than her independence.  So I help her when I can.  It feels really good to finally be able to do that.  And I love that girl.

My dressform and a top I’m upcycling into something new:

Please wish me luck that my money keeps on keeping on for long enough that I can at least acquire what I need and be able to get a job at the end of it all.  Thank you, and I say Good Day.

When Adrienne writes about summer ending it is not always the happiest read.  However, I am not prepared to make this post a depressing pile of self-pity.  Actually, it’s been pretty nice outside.  Today is a little cold for me, at a brisk 58 degrees F, but all in all it’s sometimes sunny, sometimes cloudy, and I’m just grateful that it isn’t freezing. 

I am trying so hard to grow my hair out…but I had quite the unstylable mullet going on and something had to be done.  Now, I had no intentions of really cutting it, like to ribbons.  I simply evened the front up with the back so that I once again have a bob.  It’s just easier to grow out that way, plus I can actually wear my hair down now.  I have a hairstyle.  Coming from someone who has never been without a defining hairstyle this is pretty rare for me, and rather weird.  But, it’s all better now.

Wow, I look blonde in this picture, but it is not true.  I am a brunette, folks.  I’m trying to grow out my natural color which is light ash brown.  I’m pretty happy with the simple trim I did this morning.

I will probably, hopefully write more later, but for now I must finish this week’s homework and text back my friend Lab (Lauren Brechner) who wants me to come watch a movie with her and hem her pants.  Fun!

Okay, after almost 3 hours of homework I am back for a moment before I go to Lab’s house.  I just wanted to add a couple of things…

Number one:  Two months ago my hair was short.  I mean, faux-hawk short.  Before I trimmed my neckline, I had a little over 3 inches of hair at the nape.  Holy Yoda.  And do you know how I got my hair to grow so fast?  No, I didn’t get pregnant or take pre-natal pills.  I didn’t take fish oil or put anything out of the ordinary in my hair.  I took one 1000mg tablet of Biotin a day.  Let’s do a little simple math.  On average, hair grows 1/2 an inch per month.  Mine grew an inch and 1/2 per month.  That means that while I was taking Biotin everyday, my hair grew 3 TIMES FASTER than average.  This isn’t a plug…why would a lass like myself care about plugging a nutritional supplement which has no advertisement?  I’m just saying, for those of you who want to grow your hair out, take Biotin.  I got my bottle of 60 tabs for $3.00 at Dollar General.  You can’t go wrong.  And no, I’m not plugging Dollar General either.  Those bastards had 8 chances to hire me and never even called. 

Second of all:  I re-vamped my blog, as you can see.  In a time in my life when all I want is clear, calm space and simplicity I thought my blog should reflect that.  Financial aid woes, being forced to eat fast food and struggling to pay for that, plus trying like mad to move out and start my life with my fiance……………are all driving me batty.  Worse than batty.  So, I cleaned my room, gutted it nearly, and redid the look of the blog.  Clean, clean, clean.  As opposed to my dirty, muddled, stinking life.  I’m making an effort in the name of solace and sanity.  Hope you like.